Roy Martin Ministries

What is in the Creation of One Sin?

There are many transgressions in one sin. If we would consider the sin of addiction, we’d have to think the act is tantamount to breaking God’s Law or sin. However, there are many “transgressions” we create which leads to that one big one, picking up. It begins with a thought. Now, we’re not responsible for the temptation which is initiated by the enemy, but we are responsible for the thought which gives the temptation power to begin rule over us. Then it is the planning of the sin. How are we going to accomplish what we want without getting caught? Then it is the actual moving toward the sinful act. We steal from others and ourselves by taking money, even if it is our own earned money, it could have been going toward a better purpose than the one you now have in your mind.

Get my point? Transgressions are committed, one by one, until finally you are at the point of seclusion and committing the act. Each of those transgressions, let’s call them “little sins” led to the one now you’re doing and soon will feel shame, guilt, remorse and disgust. If we could just get past those transgressions and the actual committing of the act, and consider the after affects, I believe we can make much progress in our life in staying clean. I know, I do it. I think about the pain I will experience. I think of the shame, the hiding and lying and stealing and—it’s not worth it. No matter my experience now, it is certainly much better than what I will have to go through later by committing the sin.

So, when the temptation occurs in your mind, fast forward to what is the end result. Oh, did I mention death?

The one thing you can count on is this: If you don’t do it, then you don’t have a whole lot of worrying to do later.

Sobriety

Sobriety is defined as: abstinence from or moderation in the use of alcohol or drugs; the quality of being serious and thoughtful; a lack of vitality or brightness.

I’m not sure I like the definition. I know for me and probably you, too, there is no such thing as “moderation” when it comes to substance abuse, and that substance could be: alcohol, drugs, pornography, gambling, etc. I certainly do not like to be considered as having a “lack” of vitality or brightness. Perhaps while in the midst of my addiction this held true, but except for the loss of some brain cells I am not brain damaged! Now, the other definition: “quality of being serious and thoughtful”, that’s more like it but it doesn’t answer the achievement of what I have been able to do—to have clean-time or clean-living. So, from this point on, you will only hear me refer to myself as having clean-time. No more sobriety. It seems the word itself is so associated with substance abuse it has been dirtied itself, just as I was, and I just wish to separate myself completely from the past.

When I think of “clean-living or clean-time”, it visualizes a life where I am free from past contaminants, and life is being lived with all the beauty it does have to offer and only now I’m a participant and not a spectator. It means I have something to offer instead of taking. It just means I’m worthy to be around instead of shunned. I’m not abstaining from anything as much as I’m participating and making life wonderful and find no time to invest my money, life and efforts into something as disgusting as a life of addiction.

If I have given up smoking cigarettes, I don’t need a cigarette lighter. Correspondingly, if I have given up addiction, I don’t need a tag which reminds me of such.

All About Balance?

The power of your addiction is evidence of the weakness of your heart. The stronger the power, the weaker you are. When one rises, the other lowers. When your heart is strong, your addiction is lowered. What you concentrate on and do mostly is what you are. Those things you would do but cannot, exemplify who you are, or are becoming. The addiction has defined you. You have no control over yourself or any aspect of your life. You are an open cesspool continuing to worsen. But, when you have heart, you begin to govern your life in a way which is productive, satisfying and loved by others.

Is it all about balance? The whole aspect of life is actually not to find it! No matter how successful it might seem, you DO NOT want to balance addiction with your life. You want to be rid of it completely. You want to tip the scale so much in your favor that your every thought, goal and effort is in living a life devoid of addictions. No more, no more of whatever it is(was).

Do you want to accomplish more each day? Then lower the time spent in addiction. Do you want to be successful in your job, with your family and friends, in doing your hobbies, in just living life? This can ONLY be accomplished when there isn’t a force of addiction working to counter the good you wish to do.

Do you have a goal you would like to achieve?

Then stop doing everything else which is taking away from it.

God’s Plan Will Come to Fruition

In the summer of 1995 I began writing, “If You Send Me, I Will Go”, well, actually it was entitled, “Back From Crack”, then “If You Send Me, I’ll Go”. I had to take out the contraction because the software I was using couldn’t place the apostrophe properly, but I liked the way it turned out, “…will go”. It sounds more determined and concise and that’s the point I want to have in my life, to be more determined and concise in what I do. This is the same with God.

No matter how long it takes, He has a plan for your life which will come to a successful conclusion. Fourteen years to write and publish a book was not delayed because of anything on my part, my constant relapses, etc. He knew when he gave me the idea to write the date when it would be published. I just didn’t know it. There is nothing He starts He doesn’t finish.

Now, as I sit and wait for the first delivery, I have no idea of how to go about marketing it. I have no idea of where this project will take me or how successful “I” will be in being able to make a living from it. In fact, as I am writing this devotional you’re reading now, I had no idea where it might lead except it needed to be written. God’s plan for our lives knows no boundary.

No matter how long it takes, if you have God in your life,

It will take as long as it needs to take. He will see you through

When You Have Interruptions…

Don’t stress. You have put into place a plan, goals to achieve and then all of a sudden you get hit with a period where you cannot do anything to forward your purposes. Whatever it may be, bad emotional upheaval, disappointment, tiredness, lack of energy or just plain procrastination, it will end and when it does, get back to working your life goals. Don’t allow a period of inactivity to define you. It is a period of time which passes. Let it pass and then rejoin whatever it is which is important to you.

Too many of us have thought this period of time is when we think we haven’t what it takes to go forward. We think of it as a sign to quit. What were we thinking that this would have been possible? I’m glad I haven’t spent too much energy already. But look what good has occurred in whatever time you did spend. It was a dream. Dreams do come true, but they have to be acted upon. So, don’t allow this time to cause you to quit. We have overcome some habits that others will never understand so there is fire in us which cannot be quenched “if” we don’t let it. If you’ve ever burned coal or wood, you know there are periods when it burns down needing to be stoked. Stoke yourself. It’s time to get that flame a-burnin’ again.

When you take a break, that’s all it is.

Do not let the break break you.

What Did They Have to Give Up?

At some point in our experience we come across those leaders God has placed before us to show us our way back to Him in order to reach sobriety. There a love affair begins with a desire in wanting to be like them. We want to have what they have knowing where they came from, the streets just as we did. They seem to have it all together, again, and from this we have hope for ourselves. However, what we fail to understand, it wasn’t easy for them either.

What did they have to give up? We think if we could just stop shooting, snorting, or smoking, we’d be okay. But the truth of the matter is, that’s not it. We lived a life of no discipline. Along this road we traveled, we forgot how to be responsible and live like ordinary people. We breached our own normal standards of life and created additional issues besides the major one we’re fighting today. Those leaders struggled, and perhaps still do, with other areas in their life which came about due to their own history of substance abuse.

So, when you look at them today, realize we are all in this battle still—together. There are straggling problems which are being overcome but haven’t found their conclusion just yet. So, give them a break and see them as just up the street a little ways from where you are. The fact you can still see them proves they haven’t made it into the Kingdom. We’re all striving but just reaching back to give a hand to someone who’s just a little bit behind us.

It takes those who have walked in the path,

To direct those on how to get a little further.

Bringing It All Together

Ever wonder what God is doing to your life? I do. There are so many pieces which finally seem to be coming together. Why did God have an uncle suggest forty years ago take typing? It certainly has been a lot easier to write with the skill of typing. Why did God tell me to move to Atlanta, just as I was finishing the writing of the book? I met a person who is involved in self-publishing which bypasses all the aggravation of having a major publishing company agrees to publish your work after they tear down the value of it. You keep control. Why did God send me to Washington, DC thirty-five years ago where I would meet the newscaster today who would be the catalyst for local exposure? Why did I meet a young man yesterday, while taking a walk and he’s involved in a national cable channel which could be the catalyst of national exposure. Why did God take me through drug addiction so, I could have a story to tell?

It’s simply amazing how everything in your life has a purpose. It is not by chance these things have happened and are happening to you. It is not by chance you are where you are right now. God has a purpose for your life no matter how messed up it might seem at the moment. You are in a valley today but that valley doesn’t extend forever. No valleys do, well, unless you have decided to remain where you are today. But if you do, know this was not God’s plan for you. He has given you so much more. Take it. I intend to do so.

No one less than the great God we serve,

Could have taken the broken pieces of our lives

And made such a wonderful humanity we are today.

Where There Is No Expectations…

…There can be no disappointments. My friends are accustomed to hearing this saying from me because I have made it a fact of my life. Very seldom am I disappointed, by others, because I don’t have any expectations of them. Our relationship with God is almost along the same concept. I used to pray, “Lord, forgive me for frustrating Your plan for me.” Then I realized, I was seeing God as I saw myself! God cannot and is not disappointed in us because He has known all along what we would do or not do. It is just we, who can only be disappointed in ourselves and this we should not let be the overriding factor of how we live our lives. If so, we will become depressed, giving up and you know what the end result of this will be.

Know that God loves you. Unconditionally. He has given you all you need to make you into the person He wants you to be. So what if you’ve taken a detour and has brought you along this way, but the fact of the matter is, He can and will have the end objective—your salvation, IF, and I repeat emphatically, IF, you want it. You will hear people say, “I’m striving to be in the Kingdom.” I see it differently. I’m striving to “stay” in the Kingdom because God has assured me a place already!

When you have fallen, get up! When you are feeling low, shake it off! When you are disappointed, know it was for a reason! Don’t allow yourself to remain in this frame of mind. God expects better of you and know what you will do. You just got to get with the program already designed and determined for you. Now, move along.

You are exactly where you’re supposed to be,

Right now, and at this very moment!

You can’t do any better than that!

It’s Snowing

Right now it is twenty-three degrees outside! And it is snowing. Well, not really “cover the ground” kinda snow but little flakes falling which you’d have trouble seeing if you weren’t looking at just the right angle. But, it reminded me of those days when I was “out there”. Oh, I dreaded waking up in the “Mission” or other homeless shelters and having to trudge out in the cold wind and snow. I didn’t have proper shoes and even if I did it would only have brought temporary relief. Eventually those toes would get cold and numb.

I remember walking through a blizzard, in sneakers to get to my brother’s home. For more than three hours, I kept the steady moving of one foot ahead of the other. At times, I could not see the street, which was my guide because there was no sidewalk. It was buried and there hadn’t been a chance for anyone to shovel yet. The kind of snow you can’t keep your head normal but bent down to keep the biting snow from hurting. Then you recognize why God made eyelashes. You keep blinking them to keep the snow from caking. Now, that’s snow.

Today, I’m inside. Still homeless only because I don’t have a place to call my own but the time is coming when I will. But, at least I am inside. It’s warm. I’ve had a nice breakfast. I’m writing and I’m blessed.

It can snow as much and hard and it can be as cold as it wants to be. Except, I still remember those who are still “out there”. So, I change my mind. Not about the weather. I just want the weather to encourage them to try to get to where I am today. Sober.

Sometimes, I think the weather is God’s way of showing emotion.

Like the time it rained profusely when I left a three day binge.

God was crying and His tears were covering mine.

Going Back

I am designing the cover for my book, “If You Send Me, I Will Go” and I have to go back, “out there” for just a moment in order to photograph the “Hood” to demonstrate leaving a life of grace and where one ends up. Also, I need to photograph a “stem”. I looked for online stock photos, but did not find what I wanted. I also will have to spend the night away, next week, and it just might be where I’ve come from, the streets. There is queasiness in my stomach about these matters but I’ve come to realize in this experience: I can do it and God is requiring me to do it.

When you’ve come clean, God will often send you back to give someone what was given to you. You are His witness He is able to salvage lives but they, those still out there, won’t know it unless you tell them. They have to be able to see, touch and speak with those who know what it is they’re going through on a daily basis. Your hand will be the Hand of God they’ll touch, that will lift them up and start them, too, on the same road of life you’re experiencing today.

Can you do it? Will you do it? I’ve committed my life to doing so. So, “Going Back” is not a test of some sort. It’s the experience I have to undergo to meet you or someone like us who needs us to go get them. Going back doesn’t mean, “Going Back”. It really means confirmation of now it’s time to “Go Forward”.

Going backwards means having to go through the mess

You’ve already went through, and then it means

Having to go through it once again to be where you are today.

Why not just stay where you are today since this is where you’ll end up anyway?